A few years ago, I was wandering in Paldi area. A car came by and
stopped near the sidewalk and the man who was driving the car asked me, “Which
is the way to go to Maninagar?” There were three roads and I was totally
confused as I didn’t know my city well. His grandparents who were quarreling
over which road to take, eagerly looked at me, and I said, “I don’t know. You
can check Google maps.” And they laughed. That day, for the first time, not
knowing an answer didn’t make me feel guilty because I started accepting that I
can’t know everything. (And another thing
I learned that day was how not to answer lame!)
So, here come the
toughest parts, ‘why to accept’ and ‘how to accept’. There are two situations:
1. You are working a lot and now you’re tired. You still think that you’ll complete the project in one hour before sleeping. Now here, you need to accept the fact that you’re tired; your brain is tired. Either your one-hour-work will take two-three hours or you’ll complete it in one hour on bad terms. The only thing you must do is to control your mind and take a good nap and complete the project in the early morning. (For a backup, you can make a copy of that unfinished project and wake up two hours earlier to finish it just in case something goes wrong.)
2. Your boss calls you at the office. This is the day that can get you a promotion but your heart is just not ready to do it. Now here is the time when you take a sip of water and start your presentation rather than accepting the fact that your heart is feeling weak and you should stop this thing. Not to complete what you have started or avoiding the presentation day is not a brave thing.
These two situations show us that you can’t accept
any random thing that comes in your mind. You have to analyze the situation and
you have to keep in mind what the consequences can be. You should have done
your project and your presentation on the day they were given rather than
procrastinating; if you haven’t, rather than being stressed out at the end
time, you should accept what had happened and what will happen. Accept the
fact, challenge yourself with what you have done and what you can do. You can
do the one-hour project later in the morning but you can’t say “Boss, will
present tomorrow”/run from there.
Now look at our parents and us. We show ourselves as
cool people pretending that our parents are cool; and Indian parents actually
are. (Because, they are the most sarcastic people you have ever known! Duh!)
So, just accept that you’re not Sharmaji’s son kinda perfect-sanskari kid and
they are not as cool as I-support-my-son Sharmaji (because you’re not
Sharmaji’s son kinda…)
Remember what Mark Manson has quoted in his book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck,
“While there is something to be said for ‘staying on the sunny side of life,’ the truth is, sometimes life sucks, and the healthiest thing you can do is admit it.”
If I say in medical terms, if you take a step
towards this acceptance of the situation, you stay a few steps away from
suffering from the Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
In simple words, OCD means you become obsessive over a thing and keep doing
that, thinking that if it won’t happen that way something will go wrong. (e.g. exaggerated form of Monica’s cleanliness,
the ‘Turtles All the Way Down’ book’s Aza’s situation, etc.) The therapy is
just to accept whatever is going on around you: it is fine if you don’t wash
your hands every time, or don’t clean your house as you regularly do; it won’t
kill anyone. So, I say, it’s okay if you fail, just accept and take some
lessons and start doing your studies or your work again; it’s acceptable if
your boyfriend doesn’t bring the gift on the valentine’s day; it’s totally fine
if you take vacation from the routine you have always loved.
Just accept: sometimes it will help you and
sometimes it will be the only option. Because when you accept, you evolve!
चलचित्र Time: 'हाँ तो?!' मुझे नही पता था कि 'तो' में इतनी ताकत होती है... 'हाँ तो!?' बोलो और आगे का sentence null हो जाता है... -Zakir Khan (कक्षा ११वीं)
So, say, 'so what- if your room is full of mess; if you failed; if you couldn't get married this year; if you didn't get the job...' and add what you can do. The words after 'but I can' really count...
